Getting Fixed.

I was at Erica's place and I noticed a chair with a broken leg. As soon as I noticed it I flipped the chair over and examined it to see how I could make it better. However I couldn't. It was busted beyond what I could fix with just a little bit of manly elbow grease. I didn't have the tools or the know how to make that chair whole again. I did however try make the semblance of a fixed chair by propping it against the wall. I hid the shame of my failure by making the chair appear to be fixed, but as soon as it moves you've got yourself a broken chair again.

This is how I deal with my own life. Here am I, a man pretending to have it all under control, but in reality I'm struggling with sin. I feel lonely and scared. And I have direct access to an Omnipotent, all loving God, who knows my shit and is ready to clean it all up and forget about it. But I don't use Him, because I can handle it. Right?

Don't get me wrong, its not like I don't want to spend time with the big guy, I just don't want to burden him with having to be the one to make me clean. Last night at lifegroup we looked at the end of Romans 3 where Paul explains that we are saved by faith, not works. There is nothing we can do to become righteous in the eyes of our Lord apart from accepting Christ as the savior.

I can't do shit to fix myself.

And that can be frustrating. I'm a man. I like to fix things. I'm working on learning to let God be God, to let his love in completely, to come to him even when I feel like I'm too dirty or broken to be fixed or loved by anyone, and to cast my cares upon Him.

Ultimately, I am working on believing that nothing can separate us from the love of God.


Also, if you get the chance read this post by Jonathan Acuff on the Stuff Christians Like blog.